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Students are today’s expressions of tomorrow’s practices。 Their words can be the visible signs of the less visible struggles encountered by us all。
I have a memory from my own undergraduate years of a headline in my campus newspaper： “Why Aren’t We Happy？” As the headline suggests； we fell short of leading joyful lives。 Yet at least happiness was still on the agenda。 What underlies the tendency of many of us； like my success…seeking student； to give up genuinely trying？
I’ve often failed to enjoy Sunday because of my schedule on Monday。 At bottom； it was simply anticipatory anxiety over the work of the week ahead—fear that there would be unexpected plications or that I would fail to measure up in some way。 Usually； when Monday came； I did quite well。 Much of what I worried about never happened。
Joy has its own moral underpinning。 There’s a pleteness to joy that does not allow us to exclude our sense of the person we should be。 Pleasure is certainly possible in less…than…honorable actions。 But the experience of joy requires more； it is pleasure taken in worthy things。
True joy requires choices that develop into habits that evolve into character。 And that’s work we can’t delegate。
The essential first step is trying to live a less fearful life—one that avoids collapsing life’s possibilities before exploring them。 It entails weling uncertainty and fortable inpleteness。
。 想看书来
我们在享受快乐吗（1）
佚名
我们都被洗了脑！我们被灌输了这样的职业道德：“工作（和忍受）到生命的最后一刻，幸运的话，就直到退休。我们没有时间浪费在无聊的事情上。我们有体现自身价值的责任。我们一定要认真而努力地工作，在事业上进步，赚更多的钱，并把赚钱和事业进步看做是生活的首要目标。”
我希望变更自己的人生计划。我知道，做自己感兴趣的事情，我会做得更好；做自己憎恶的事，我会做得一塌糊涂；在压力下工作通常会事倍功半。
我们可以改变生活中衡量某事是否该做的标准。我们需要扪心自问的不应是“它是否会赚大钱，或能否让事业更上一层楼”，而是“我对这感兴趣吗？这事有意思吗？我要大干一番吗？”
如果你不能肯定地回答这些问题，那么，这些很有可能就不是你该做的事情！
如果是诸如纳税、洗碗等你必须做的事情，解决的办法就是找别人代你做，你不喜欢做的事情自有人喜欢做。的确如此！举个例子来说，我并非世界上最棒的家庭主妇，我讨厌打扫卫生，擦地板和窗户等家务活，可偏偏有些人喜欢这种冥想性质的工作，并能在工作圆满完成后获得真正的满足。如果我雇人来做这些事，我则可以利用这些时间去做自己喜欢的事情来赚钱，这对我大有裨益。
人各有不同，不同的人适合做不同的事。某人喜欢做特定的某件事，这并不意味着你也必须要去喜欢。我所谓的“乐趣指数”可以用来帮助我们了解某一行为适合哪些人去做。判断一件事情是否该去做，不能只凭它能否带来物质利益和事业进步等经验主义，而应看此事是否能给我们带来乐趣并使我们获得满足感。你的工作带给你自豪感和满足感了吗？你是在执行“应该”指令还是依照“想做”的意愿呢？
然而，这种规划是异常强大的。我发现，勉强自己做事的结果就是能拖则拖、没完没了。你留意过吗？做自己不喜欢的事情似乎总也做不完。反之，则如俗语所云：“乐在其中，浑然不知所谓何日。”
我们要反对旧的规划，并相信“乐趣指数”是一个流动工程。每个小的进步同时也是一个大的飞跃。每一步都会淡化你对生活的不满情绪，强化你的自爱、自我认同和自尊感，让你更易感知生活中的乐趣。
不论何时，你都不能忽视这种内在激励，否则，你便会日益陷入自厌与自责的泥潭，再次感到消沉没落。每一次的失望都会强化心中的那个信念：别人的愿望比自己的更加重要。于是，你内在的欲求便会再次被压抑到最低位置。
但是，这就是你的生活！为何要让他人指示你“应该”怎样生活呢？问问你自己，你想怎样规划自己的人生！聆听内心的声音，它会告诉你什么会真正充实和满足你。要知道，你才是自己生活的主宰者！毕竟，这是你的生活，不是吗？
■ 心灵小语
生活是属于自己的，快乐也是属于自己的，不要让别人来设计你的生活，不要让别人来告诉你该做什么、不该做什么，那样你就会失去自我的选择，失去其实本该属于你的快乐。学会控制自己的生活，掌握自己的幸福！
Are We Having Fun Yet
Anonymous
We’ve all been brainwashed！ We were all taught the work ethic！ “Work （and suffer） till you die； or if you’re lucky retire。 We don’t have time to waste on frivolities。 We have responsibilities to fulfill。 We have to be serious； work hard； rise in our career； make lots of money； and make earning money and advancing in our career a priority。”
I wish to change that programming in my life。 I know that when I do the things I enjoy doing； things work out better for me。 I know that when I do something against my will； against my heart； it doesn’t work out well。 I know that stressing myself out to try to get a job done usually takes twice as long as taking time out and doing that same task at some other time in a relaxed manner。
我们在享受快乐吗（2）
We can change the criteria by which we decide what to do in our lives。 Instead of “Will it bring in lots of money or advance my career”； we need to ask ourselves； “Will I enjoy doing this？ Will this be fun？ Am I looking forward to getting started on this？”
If you can’t answer “yes” to these questions； then quite possibly this is not the task for you！
If it is something that must be done； ； dishes； etc。； the solution is to find someone else to do them for you。 There are some people who will enjoy and love to do what you prefer not to do。 Really！ For example； I am not the world’s best housekeeper。 I do not really enjoy cleaning； washing floors； windows； etc。 Yet there are some people who enjoy the meditative aspect of this work and who really get satisfaction from a job well done。 It is to my benefit to pay someone to do this work so I can take that time earning money doing things that I enjoy。
We are all very different and different things appeal to each one of us。 Just because someone else enjoys a particular thing does not mean that you must。 We can trust what I call the “fun index” to assist us in knowing if a particular action is the one for us。 We can break away from the rule of thumb that judges things by whether they bring money or career advancement。 We can change that to making our decisions based on whether an action will bring us pleasure and personal satisfaction。 Does the work you do leave you feeling proud and pleased with yourself？ Are you following the voice of “shoulds” or the one of “want to”？
Yet； the programming is strong。 I find myself struggling over a task and it ends up dragging itself out。 Have you noticed that the things that you dislike doing are the ones that seem to take forever to get done？ As for the opposite viewpoint； well as the saying goes； “Time flies when you’re having fun！”
Learning to go against that old programming and trusting the “fun index” is an ongoing project。 Every small step is； at the same time； a big leap。 Each step will move you away from dissatisfaction with your life and closer to self…love； self…acceptance； self…esteem and joy in your everyday existence。
Anytime you ignore that inner prompting； you accumulate self…loathing and disappointment in your being。 Your inner child once again feels letdown and unimportant。 Each letdown reinforce the inner child’s belief that everybody else’s wishes are more important than its own。 Once again its desires are relegated to the lowest priority on the list。
Yet； it’s YOUR life！ Why let someone else dictate how you “should” live it？ Ask yourself what steps YOU want to take！ Listen to the voice within which will tell you what would really make you feel fulfilled and satisfied。 YOU ARE the boss of your life！ After all； it’s yours； isn’t it？
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幸福是一种感觉
佚名
有一天在杂货店，我和一个朋友排队购物时，我不断地向她诉说我的孩子们是多么懒惰。那天清晨，我上完晚班回家，房间又像多数时候那样，乱作一团。
“我觉得，如今的孩子总是一味索取，我为他们竭尽全力，可他们甚至都不能帮我保持房间整洁。就算我不烦，其他女人看到我那又脏又乱的房间，也会指责我。”
“你知道自己多幸福吗？”我们身后的一个女人说道，“我非常希望回到家后，能看到房子里混乱不堪。地毯弄脏了，或者到处是碟子、成堆的脏衣服、混杂的袜子，我都不介意，甚至别人要说我的房子有多脏，我也不在乎。事实上，我就喜欢那样。只要能再和我的孩子们在一起，能拥抱、亲吻并告诉他们，我是多么爱他们，我就非常愿意踢开脚边的杂物，在混乱的房子里穿行。你知道吗？在一次车祸中，我的两个孩子都遇难了，现在只剩下我和丈夫，我的房子总是很干净，衣服堆放整洁，碟子也摆放妥当。
“墙壁上没有手指印，莫名其妙的污点也不会出现在地毯上。房子里没有吵闹声，没有砰的关门声，没有笑声，也听不到有人说‘我爱你，妈妈’。所以，要知道，你是多么幸福啊！此刻你所反感的一切正是我渴望得到的。我多么希望能抱着自己的孩子，擦干他们的眼泪，分享他们的梦想，或者只是看着他们玩耍。如果我还有孩子，房子再乱我也不在乎，只要拥有他们，我就开心了。”
现在，如果你走进我的房子，看到一片混乱。你觉得多糟糕我都无所谓，因为我感到非常幸福。
■ 心灵小语
有时候，麻烦也是一种幸福，就看我们以一个怎样的角度来看待它。当你的孩子经常吵闹的时候，你会觉得他们很烦；当你的孩子离你而去了，你就会感到原来孩子的吵闹也是一种幸福。
Blessed
Anonymous
A friend and I were standing in line at the grocery store the other day； and I was telling her how lazy my children were。 I had e in from work that morning； and like most times； my house was wrecked。
“I believe children nowadays are just out for what they can get。 I bend over backwards for them； and they can’t even help keep our house clean。 It wouldn’t