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“Pete！” Blair squeaked。
He exhaled loudly； the sound of his breath filling the room and morphing into a strangled cry。 He hurled the flowers to the ground and an explosion of red petals scattered on the thick blue carpet。
“I can explain；” Blair said in horror。 She knew how bad this looked。 She knew there really wasn’t a logical explanation。 But she needed Pete to know this was a total misunderstanding。 “Please listen；” Blair choked out； diving toward Pete。
“You’re in bed with that asshole？” Pete asked。 And then he laughed； one short； angry bark。 “Of course you are。” He shook his head。
“No；” she protested。 She felt like she was going to throw up。 This could not be happening。 Please believe me； she silently begged。 “He’s drunk and he just found me。 He just came in like two seconds ago。 I thought he was you。”
Pete shook his head sadly； as if Blair’s explanation was so ridiculous he felt embarrassed even to be hearing it。
“Dude； sorry；” Nate said； trying to stand up。 He understood this was bad。 He didn’t want Blair to go back to that other guy； but he also didn’t want to hurt her。 And now he was； and it was all so fucking confusing。 His foot got caught in a tangle of sheets and he face…planted on the floor。
Karma’s a bitch。
“You deserve each other；” Pete said； turning on his heel and slamming the door。 Blair could hear his footsteps tromping down the hall。 The elevator whooshed open and he was gone。 She turned and gazed down at Nate； pathetically collapsed in a pile。
“Fuck you；” she whispered； her eyes finally filling with all the tears she’d held in for the past day。 Every time。 Every time。 Every time she was almost happy； Nate managed to fuck it up。 Even worse； every time she managed to fall for it。
“But Blair…” Nate struggled to his feet。
Suddenly； she felt the vodka sodas from earlier swirling in her stomach and knew she was going to throw up。 Just like always。 She felt like a confused and lonely fifteen…year…old。 And it was all Nate’s fault。
She ran into the bathroom； kneeled down； and retched into the toilet bowl again and again。 When she was finished； she leaned her forehead against the cool whiteness of the toilet seat； knowing she looked as pathetic as she felt。
“You okay？” she heard from the other side of the door。 Nate’s voice sounded whiny； the way it sometimes did when he was really； really baked。 That was what gave her the motivation to stand up； splash her face with water； vigorously brush her teeth with her imported Marvis toothpaste； and emerge from the bathroom。 Nate was standing at the door； his hands at his sides； shifting from foot to foot。
“Blair—” he began。
“Get out！” Blair yelled with every force of her being。 “You’re bad for me。 I never want to see you again。” She opened the door； her whole body shaking； but Nate just stood there。
“Fine；” she said。 “If you won’t leave； I will。” And with that she was gone。
Sometimes misery doesn’t love pany。
puppy love
Vanessa banged around the kitchen of the loft； feeling like an angry housewife。 It was almost ten o’clock and she hadn’t heard from Hollis since she stormed out of their pitch meeting。 No； scratch that。 Since she stormed out of his pitch meeting。 She pulled out a mug from the cabinet and boiled water to make tea。 She wasn’t one of those people who drank when she was upset； so organic chai would have to do。
The worst thing about it was that she’d done this to herself。 She used to be a shaven…headed； black…garbed； kick…ass filmmaker who always wore steel…toe boots and didn’t put up with shit from anyone。 Now she was this needy girlfriend type without any projects of her own； without an apartment of her own； and with no one she could even talk to。 Last year； Vanessa had spent practically every Friday night with the other NYU film majors at Bushwick Country Club； a Williamsburg bar with mini golf。 But ever since she and Hollis had bee serious； it had bee harder and harder to carve out time to meet with her old friends。 She considered calling her sister； Ruby； but all she and Piotr could talk about was whether the fetus was the size of a gerbil or an avocado。
She heard the whir of the elevator and felt her stomach twist in contempt。 What the fuck was the point of living in Brooklyn if you had an elevator leading straight to your apartment？
“Hey。” Hollis sheepishly walked into the apartment； holding a box of Franzia wine out like a peace offering。 In his other hand was a leash—attached to a brown and white puppy。 The wine was an inside joke； since one of their first dates had been at a tiny Chinese restaurant that served free boxed wine。
And the puppy？
“Celebrating your new deal？” Vanessa refused to take the wine from his hands or even ask about the dog。 She grabbed her mug of tea and walked into their newly set…up corner office。 One side was hers； the other his。 She opened her MacBook Pro and clicked onto the apartment listings on Craigslist。 She didn’t really want to move or break up with Hollis； but she didn’t know what else to do。
“Don’t be mad。” Hollis put his hands on Vanessa’s shoulders and whirled her Aeron chair around so she faced him。 His gray eyes were wide with concern； and his chin had a tiny bit of the five o’clock stubble that Vanessa had always found so sexy。 “I have someone for you to meet。 This is Norma Desmond。 She sort of has this diva…ish personality； but I think there’s a lot going on beneath the surface。 She’s certainly a charmer。” He scooped up the tiny puppy and waved its paw at her。
“You decided to get a dog。 Any other decisions you made today that you didn’t tell me about？” Vanessa asked crisply。 She gazed down at Norma； who was shaking her tiny butt uncontrollably。 The name was from Sunset Boulevard； a film Vanessa and Hollis both loved。
“Look； Vanessa； I know you’re mad。 I’m really； really sorry about the way everything went down。 I should never have had you pitch the film to Streetscape。” Hollis’s eyes looked so sweet and sincere that Vanessa wanted to believe him。
“So then why were you going along with them？ Why didn’t you leave with me？” Vanessa asked sharply。 She glanced down at her beat…up Doc Martens so she wouldn’t have to look at his face when he lied。 She willed her boots not to kick him。
“Because Streetscape has changed。 I realized that when I saw it was Stacy handling the meeting。 Stacy is under a lot of pressure to make movies that will sell。 Before； no one knew who she was； so she could afford to take risks。 Now； she’s known in Hollywood and she’s scared shitless。 That’s why she called that other exec in。 I know the demo talk is bullshit； but it’s the formula that works。 I mean； I’m still building my career and they’re the best and I trust them； but I know they’re not the best for you；” Hollis explained。 “And I just got Norma because I felt so guilty and she’s so cute。 She’s part chow and part poodle。 She’s a choodle；” Hollis explained proudly。 “And I wanted to see you smile。”
The puppy was adorable； and Vanessa fought a smile。 She didn’t want to be won over so easily。 “Why did you even set up the meeting？”
“I got excited。 I love your story；” Hollis said earnestly。 “But what they want to do isn’t your movie。 Once I saw how off…track they were getting； I pushed them away from your idea on purpose。 I didn’t want you to wind up making a movie that would promise your vision。”
“Really？” Vanessa grinned shyly。 Now that she thought about it； Hollis hadn’t really spoken up at the meeting until after the story had gotten so off…track—and after Stacy had made it clear she wasn’t going to have it any other way。
“Of course。 So they want me to direct the film。 It’s on location—in Iceland。 And I’ll have to go to Australia too； to cast the Maoris。 The twin kids evolved into a whole family； like Cheaper by the Dozen but with Maoris； in Iceland。 But I told them I needed to think about it。 I’ll drop it in a second if you want me to。” Hollis gazed down at Vanessa。
Vanessa glanced around the apartment—the brand…new ecochic furniture； the clean； bare walls they hadn’t decorated； the expansive living room they planned to throw so many dinner parties in。 If Hollis went to Iceland； it would be a long time before they really lived in this apartment together。 But dropping a Streetscape project was equivalent to career suicide。
Just then； Norma whined plaintively。 “Well； I’m going to take Norma’s protest as a no；” Hollis shrugged； scooping up the puppy。
“No。” Vanessa shook her head definitively。 They had plenty of time to build a life together。 After all； she was only a sophomore。 “You need to do it。 I want you to do it—we both do。” Vanessa reached for the puppy and buried her nose in its soft and fluffy fur。 “How long will you be gone？” she asked。
“A few months。 But you can e to Reykjavík whenever you want。 I mean； you need to。 I don’t know what I’ll do without you。”
“You’re not gone yet；” Vanessa murmured。 It was a lot to process。 She was sad； but not upset。 Yes； Hollis was leaving； but somehow； their relationship seemed stronger than ever—strong enough to stand the distance。 And maybe a few months apart wou