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Jenny had remembered。
“Oh。 My。 God；” Rain whispered to Kati in the back of the room。 “Did
she like； pick up her clothes at a homeless shelter on the way
here？”
“She didn’t even brush her hair；” Isabel giggled。 “I wonder where
she slept last night。”
Mrs。 Weeds ended the hymn with a crashing chord。
Mrs。 M cleared her throat。 “And now； a moment of silence for those
less fortunate than we are。 Especially for the Native Americans that
were slaughtered in the founding of this country； of whom we ask
no hard feelings for celebrating Columbus Day yesterday；” she said。
The room fell silent。 Well； almost。
“Look； see how Serena’s resting her hands on her stomach？ She’s
probably pregnant；” Isabel Coates whispered to Rain Hoffstetter。
“You only do that when you’re pregnant。”
“She could have had an abortion this morning。 Maybe that’s why
she’s late；” Rain whispered back。
“My father gives money to Phoenix House；” Kati told Laura Salmon。
“I’m going to find out if Serena’s been there。 I bet that’s why she
came back halfway through term。 She’s been in rehab。”
“I hear they’re doing this thing in boarding school where they mix
et and cinnamon and instant coffee and snort it。 It’s like speed；
but it makes your skin turn green if you do it too long；” Nicki Button
piped up。 “You go blind； and then you die。”
Blair caught snippets of her friends’ chatter； and it made her smile。
Mrs。 M turned to nod at Serena。
“Girls； I’d like you all to wele back our old friend Serena van der
Woodsen。 Serena will be rejoining the senior class today。” Mrs。 M
smiled。 “Why don’t you find a seat； Serena？”
Serena walked lightly down the center aisle of the auditorium and
sat down in an empty chair next to a chronic nose…picking second
grader named Lisa Sykes。
Jenny could hardly contain herself。 Serena van der Woodsen！ She
was there； in the same room； only a few feet away。 So real。 And so
mature…looking now。
I wonder how many times she’s done it； Jenny wondered to herself。
She imagined Serena and a blond Hanover boy leaning against the
trunk of a big old tree； his coat wrapped around both of them。
Serena had had to sneak out of her dorm without a coat。 She was
very cold； and she got tree sap in her hair； but it was worth it。 Then
Jenny pictured Serena and another imaginary boy on a ski lift。 The
ski lift got stuck and Serena climbed into the boy’s lap to get warm。
They began to kiss and they couldn’t stop themselves。 By the time
they were done； the ski lift had started again and their skis were all
tangled up； so they stayed on the chair and rode it downhill and did
it again。
How cool； Jenny thought。 Hands down； Serena van der Woodsen
was absolutely the coolest girl in the entire world。 Definitely cooler
than any of the other seniors。 And how cool to e in late； in the
middle of the term； looking like that。
No matter how rich and fabulous you are； boarding school does
have a way of making you look like a homeless person。 A glamorous
one； in Serena’s case。
She hadn’t had a haircut in over a year。 Last night she’d worn it
pulled back； but today it was down and looking pretty shaggy。 Her
boy’s white oxford shirt was frayed in the collar and cuffs； and
through it； her purple lace bra was visible。 On her feet was her
favorite pair of brown lace…up boots； and her black stockings had a
big hole behind one knee。 Worst of all； she’d had to buy all new
uniforms； since she’d thrown hers down the garbage chute when
she’d gone away to boarding school。 Her new uniform was what
stuck out the most。
The new uniforms were the plague of the sixth grade； which was the
year Constance girls graduated from a tunic to a skirt。 The new
skirts were made out of polyester and had pleats that were
unnaturally rigid。 The material had a terrible； tacky sheen and came
in a new color： maroon。 It was hideous。 And it was this maroon
uniform that Serena had chosen to wear on her first day back at
Constance。 Plus； hers came all the way down to her knees！ All of the
other seniors were wearing the same old navy blue wool skirts
they’d been wearing since sixth grade。 They’d grown so much their
skirts were extremely short。 The shorter the skirt； the cooler the
girl。
Blair actually hadn’t grown that much； so she’d secretly had hers
shortened。
“What the fuck is she wearing； anyway？” Kati Farkas hissed。
“Maybe she thinks the maroon looks like Prada or something；”
Laura sniggered back。
“I think she’s trying to make some kind of statement；” Isabel
whispered。 “Like； look at me； I’m Serena； I’m beautiful； I can wear
whatever I want。”
And she can； Blair thought。 That was one of the things that always
infuriated her about Serena。 She looked good in anything。
But never mind how Serena looked。 What Jenny and every other
person in the room wanted to know was： Why is she back？
They craned their necks to see。 Did she have a black eye？ Was she
pregnant？ Did she look stoned？ Did she have all her teeth？ Was
there anything different about her at all？
“Is that a scar on her cheek？” Rain whispered。
“She was knifed one night dealing drugs；” Kati whispered back。 “I
heard she had plastic surgery in Europe this summer； but they
didn’t do a very good job。”
Mrs。 McLean was reading out loud now。 Serena sat back in her chair；
crossed her legs； and closed her eyes； basking in the old familiar
feeling of sitting in this room full of girls； listening to Mrs。 M’s voice。
She didn’t know why she’d been so nervous that morning before
school。 She’d overslept and gotten dressed in five minutes； ripping
a hole in her black stocking with a jagged toenail。 She’d chosen her
brother Erik’s frayed old shirt because it smelled like him。 Erik had
gone to the same boarding school as Serena； but now he was away
at college； and she missed him terribly。
Just as she was leaving the apartment； her mother caught sight of
her and would have made her change her clothes if Serena hadn’t
been so late。
“This weekend；” her mother said； “we’re going shopping； and I’m
taking you to my salon。 You can’t go around looking like that here；
Serena。 I don’t care how they let you dress in boarding school。”
Then she kissed her daughter on the cheek and went back to bed。
“Oh my God； I think she’s asleep；” Kati whispered to Laura。
“Maybe she’s just tired；” Laura whispered back。 “I heard she got
kicked out for sleeping with every boy on campus。 There were
notches in the wall above her bed。 Her roommate told on her； that’s
the only way they found out。”
“Plus； all those late…night chicken dances；” Isabel added； sending
the girls into a giggling frenzy。
Blair bit her lip； fighting back the laughter。 It was just too funny。
If Jenny Humphrey could have heard what the girls in the senior
class were saying about Serena van der Woodsen； her idol； she
would have punched their lights out。 The minute Prayers was
dismissed； Jenny pushed past her classmates and darted out into
the hallway to make a phone call。 Her brother Daniel was going to
totally lose his shit when she told him。
“Hello？” Daniel Humphrey answered his cell phone on the third ring。
He was standing on the corner of Seventy…seventh Street and West
End Avenue； outside Riverside Prep； smoking a cigarette。 He
squinted his dark brown eyes； trying to block out the harsh October
sunlight。 Dan wasn’t into sun。 He spent most of his free time in his
room； reading morbid； existentialist poetry about the bitter fate of
being human。 He was pale； his hair was shaggy； and he was rock…
star thin。
Existentialism has a way of killing your appetite。
“Guess who’s back？” Dan heard his little sister squeal excitedly into
the phone。
Like Dan； Jenny was a bit of a loner； and when she needed someone
to talk to； she always called him。 She was the one who had bought
them both cell phones。
“Jenny； can’t this wait—” Dan started to say； sounding annoyed in
the way that only older brothers can。
“Serena van der Woodsen！” Jenny interrupted him。 “Serena is back
at Constance。 I saw her in Prayers。 Can you believe it？”
Dan watched a plastic coffee…cup lid skitter down the sidewalk。 A
red Saab sped down West End Avenue through a yellow light。 His
socks felt damp inside his brown suede Hush Puppies。
Serena van der Woodsen。 He took a long drag on his Camel。 His
hands were shaking so much he almost missed his mouth。
“Dan？” his sister squeaked into the phone。 “Can you hear me？ Did
you hear what I said？ Serena is back。 Serena van der Woodsen。”
Dan sucked in his breath sharply。 “Yeah； I heard you；” he said；
feigning disinterest。 “So what？”
“So what？” Jenny said incredulously。 “Oh； right； like you didn’t just
have a mini heart attack。 You’re so full of it； Dan。”
“No； I’m serious；” Dan said； pissily。 “What are you calling me for？
What do I care？”
Jenny sighed loudly。 Dan could be so irritating。 Why couldn’t he just
act happy for once？ She was so tired of his pale； miserable；
introspective…poet act。
“All right；” she said。 “F